+2
Def
Eighth Degree
Total User Posts: 8395
2 years ago
blandtaste2
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This is the thread where you can write a letter to someone in your life (or maybe not) that you may not want to/have the chance to/could get fired for IRL. I'll start.
Dear Mr. White bossman,
I see you looking. It's obvious that the file in your hand doesn't have your attention; my breasts do. Stop leaning over my desk when you drop something off - you won't be able to see them any better. Yes, I have a college degree and no children; don't be so surprised, there are many of us out there like me.
Yes, my butt is real, and no, you can't touch it. One of these days I'd like to switch roles so you can see what it feels like to be desired only for your body and not your obvious intelligence and competence. I doubt anybody would ogle your lanky frame and pale pink skin, but to each his own. You may not think so, but it would be nice if you held the door open for me too, not just for the skinny white girl with the IQ of laundry lint.
Finally, it's not OK for you to insinuate that I grew up in the ghetto by saying "You must have a long train ride back to your part of the city." I grew up in the suburbs right around peckers like you and I know just how y'all get down. Eff off.
Sincerely,
angry black woman Bland
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You are a child of this universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with god, whatever you conceive him to be. Whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. - Desiderata
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+1
Def
Endate+
Total User Posts: 39083
Reply #1: 2 years ago
DDS
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So...can a black boss grip something? LOL!
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+1
Def
Myriagon+
Total User Posts: 11476
Reply #2: 2 years ago
DabaDST
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bwhahahahhahahahahahahaha
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God work on me.
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+1
Def
Ninth Degree
Total User Posts: 9322
Reply #3: 2 years ago
reprhosenting
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Well written. *ROUND OF APPLAUSE*
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 "The hardest thing to do is to be true to yourself, especially when everybody is watching."
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+2
Def
Eighth Degree
Total User Posts: 8395
Reply #4: 2 years ago
blandtaste2
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Shut up DDS!
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You are a child of this universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with god, whatever you conceive him to be. Whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. - Desiderata
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+1
Def
Endate+
Total User Posts: 39083
Reply #5: 2 years ago
DDS
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But Bland...that sucks that's all they see on you. I'm sure you're dope at your job...fuck them
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+1
Def
Myriagon+
Total User Posts: 19359
Reply #6: 2 years ago
Fresh Que Deff
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This is the thread where you can write a letter to someone in your life (or maybe not) that you may not want to/have the chance to/could get fired for IRL. I'll start.
Dear Mr. White bossman,
I see you looking. It's obvious that the file in your hand doesn't have your attention; my breasts do. Stop leaning over my desk when you drop something off - you won't be able to see them any better. Yes, I have a college degree and no children; don't be so surprised, there are many of us out there like me.
Yes, my butt is real, and no, you can't touch it. One of these days I'd like to switch roles so you can see what it feels like to be desired only for your body and not your obvious intelligence and competence. I doubt anybody would ogle your lanky frame and pale pink skin, but to each his own. You may not think so, but it would be nice if you held the door open for me too, not just for the skinny white girl with the IQ of laundry lint.
Finally, it's not OK for you to insinuate that I grew up in the ghetto by saying "You must have a long train ride back to your part of the city." I grew up in the suburbs right around peckers like you and I know just how y'all get down. Eff off.
Sincerely,
angry black woman Bland
can i? ========================
GAMMA MUTHAFUCKIN' ETA!!!! 35 YEARS OF EXCELLENCE, O.U.T.NESS, AND BEING A PART OF THAT EIGHT!!! IF YOU DON'T KNOW, YOU BETTER ASK SOMEBODY!!!!"I did ga-googgity that girl. I gashmoigitied her gaflavity with my googis...and I am sorry." -Glenn Quagmire "When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom." -Proverbs 11:2 (NIV) I AM NOT A MEMBER OF A FRATERNITY!!!-VP "Let the broken heart fuel the pimp within." -YKP "What happens on G9 trips stay on G9 trips" -Phrozen ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My name is FQD, and I approve of this message
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+1
Def
Endate+
Total User Posts: 36004
Reply #7: 2 years ago
Reverse Psychology
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Dear Mr White Executive Director,
Stop coming by my desk every hour on the hour trying to see what I'm doing and pretending like you're going to get coffee or copies. Also, stop trying to insult my intelligence I have a college degree. As a matter of fact I have just as many degrees as you do. So, if you talk to me like I'm a field slave one more time I'm going to call my lawyer and sue this company so fast discrimination your head will be spinning.
Sincerely,
Intelligent Black Woman--Reverse Psychology
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"If God has created a better man than an Alpha man, I do not know where he is." Mona Humpries Bailey, Past National President of Delta Sigma Theta Keep in mind that love is the ability to see an imperfect person perfectly
PS: T. Harris is my new favorite person. (yes, the gub'ment!)  "99% of failures come from people who have a habit of making excuses" --George Washington Carver
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+1
Def
Myriagon+
Total User Posts: 11476
Reply #8: 2 years ago
DabaDST
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Dear G9 poster,
I find your little dirty pms very funny. Just go eff off cause I wouldn't dare have you.
Sincerely,
DabaDST
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God work on me.
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+1
Def
Ninth Degree
Total User Posts: 9322
Reply #9: 2 years ago
reprhosenting
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Also greatly executed RP!
and LMAO @ DabaDST!!
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"The hardest thing to do is to be true to yourself, especially when everybody is watching."
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+1
Def
Myriagon+
Total User Posts: 19359
Reply #10: 2 years ago
Fresh Que Deff
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Dear G9 poster,
I find your little dirty pms very funny. Just go eff off cause I wouldn't dare have you.
Sincerely,
DabaDST
wow...i wonder who that person is??  ========================
GAMMA MUTHAFUCKIN' ETA!!!! 35 YEARS OF EXCELLENCE, O.U.T.NESS, AND BEING A PART OF THAT EIGHT!!! IF YOU DON'T KNOW, YOU BETTER ASK SOMEBODY!!!!"I did ga-googgity that girl. I gashmoigitied her gaflavity with my googis...and I am sorry." -Glenn Quagmire "When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom." -Proverbs 11:2 (NIV) I AM NOT A MEMBER OF A FRATERNITY!!!-VP "Let the broken heart fuel the pimp within." -YKP "What happens on G9 trips stay on G9 trips" -Phrozen ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My name is FQD, and I approve of this message
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+1
Def
Endate+
Total User Posts: 39083
Reply #11: 2 years ago
DDS
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Dear G9 poster,
I find your little dirty pms very funny. Just go eff off cause I wouldn't dare have you.
Sincerely,
DabaDST
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+1
Def
Eighth Degree
Total User Posts: 8395
Reply #12: 2 years ago
blandtaste2
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Dear Dominican Hair Stylist,
Hola, Rosa. Como estas? Bien? Bueno. I'd like to take this time while sitting under the imaginary dryer to have a conversacion contigo, por favor.
The last time I came in here and asked you for a trim, that didn't mean cut 17 inches off of my hair. I know my ends were split, but please realize that although I have "ni-eez haya mami," my shit doesn't grow overnight. I'd like to walk out not looking like Charles Barkley, por favor.
While you're washing my hair, please don't let little Hector rummage through my bag on the chair next to me - he'll develop a bad habit and possibly end up on Cops running barefoot from a fat redneck cop named Jim. I'd like to have a scalp when I'm done under the dryer, so please don't set it to EXTRA HIGH for 1.5 hours. And lastly, don't let Luisa who just got off the boat handle the money. I gave her a $50 bill for $25 service and she gave me back 4 singles and a peppermint.
Sincerely,
Bald bland
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You are a child of this universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with god, whatever you conceive him to be. Whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. - Desiderata
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+2
Def
Endate+
Total User Posts: 39083
Reply #13: 2 years ago
DDS
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Dear Disgruntled Black Woman,
Shut up and listen. I'm sick and tired of being the one you run to when things gets bad and then you go on about your happy way when things get better. A friendship is much more than that. What's worse is you think that I can't come to you with my problems, but you can come to me with yours. Every time I try to ask for some advice, you act as if I'm annoying you with little things.
Therefore, after careful consideration and talking with my advisors, God, my soul, my mind, and my heart, we are hereby terminating our friendship. No longer will I be your crutch to lean on. I already have a bad back and don't need any more weight on my shoulders. No longer can you call me late at night with tears in your eyes. I will simply play "Cry Me A River" by Justin Timberlake. No longer will I drive you around so you can clear your head. I will tell you to go sniff the wind.
No longer will I put your feelings in front of my well-being. I could care less about your feelings from now on.
Thanks and good day,
DDS
Your Former Crutch
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+1
Def
Endate+
Total User Posts: 36922
Reply #14: 2 years ago
LadyExquisite5
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Dear Dominican Hair Stylist,
Hola, Rosa. Como estas? Bien? Bueno. I'd like to take this time while sitting under the imaginary dryer to have a conversacion contigo, por favor.
The last time I came in here and asked you for a trim, that didn't mean cut 17 inches off of my hair. I know my ends were split, but please realize that although I have "ni-eez haya mami," my shit doesn't grow overnight. I'd like to walk out not looking like Charles Barkley, por favor.
While you're washing my hair, please don't let little Hector rummage through my bag on the chair next to me - he'll develop a bad habit and possibly end up on Cops running barefoot from a fat redneck cop named Jim. I'd like to have a scalp when I'm done under the dryer, so please don't set it to EXTRA HIGH for 1.5 hours. And lastly, don't let Luisa who just got off the boat handle the money. I gave her a $50 bill for $25 service and she gave me back 4 singles and a peppermint.
Sincerely,
Bald bland
BWAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA ========================
CERTIFIED...OFFICIAL...AUTHENTIC
LEADING my life as you FOLLOW your dreams
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